Hi all.
I want to start off with a few important pointers/ disclaimers.
1. I am NOT Nigerian and do not claim to know everything about Nigeria.
2. Please do not be xenophobic or rude to me. I’m not strong enough lol
3. I will be as respectful as possible💞
4. I’ll call the man in the story “Sam”
Okay so I’m a lady from a Southern African country. I met a Nigerian man who came here for “japa”/ “looking for better opportunities”. I met him after he had arrived within 2months. I was walking into the club with my friends and he was in a vehicle with his friends. The driver stopped me to greet and he said hello. Sam greeted me and the driver asked for my number on his behalf lol. It was cute.
First thoughts, he was handsome in the face but definitely not anyone I’d be interested in talking to. He was unkept and clearly struggling financially just from his appearance. Anyway, he called that night to see if I’d be willing to chill with him and his friends, and I agreed. They came back around. He came into my car but I was put off by him telling me I’m so beautiful, calling me babe and saying “I’d wish to kiss you”. Omg I was sooooo freaked out. Anyway I told him to leave my car and never call me again. Within an hour, my car’s tyre burst ON THE flipping HIGHWAY😲. I called my father but he was almost 2 hours away so I called him and he came within 20minutes. Him nd his brothers came and fixed it for me.
From that day, we spoke and discussed every single day. I had never been with a Nigerian man or any serious relationship before but I liked him. I supported him financially for the longest time because I saw potential in him. I bought him his firs new clothes here, took him to all the nice places, and helped him with personal hygiene etc. I saw him as a friend. He is genuinely a good good person and I fell for his soul. His just so normal and pure. I am considered pretty, intelligent and independent so I won’t lie and say that I can’t find anyone else but he has my heart tbh.
Everything was going good but after 3months of being together everyday, he obviously wanted the Bleep. It was such a huge deal for me because I take that seriously. But anyway our relationship progressed in that direction – positively.
He would share the little money he had with me and food with me etc if I had recklessly spent my money etc lol. I was giving him a salary to start a business. Mind you, I studied psychology and I’m smart enough to know when I’m being scammed just because I’m a paranoid/anxious detective type naturally 🙈 anyway, we had the most incredible times and I know without a Shadow of a doubt he loves me.
Fast forward 2 months then I find that he is married with 3 kids. I knew about the kids – after finding out. Buti understand why he’d be hesitant to share that. My father is from a polygamous home so I do have strong feelings about that arrangement and single probably thought it’s a bad idea to tell me. Well I found out, I was upset af. But I got over it. He never forced me to or anything but I genuinely thought I’d figure it out.
Well it’s been 3 years. We have NEVER argued once about anything. We have the most compatible personalities. His calm, sweet and soft spoken. Same with me. His business is doing good and he has put me on a salary as I resigned, and want to start a business.
Nigerian men are the hill I’m willing to die in lol. I had Nigerian friends in the past (Yoruba) but Igbo men are just built different. They’re natural born providers. I have access to his phones and vice versa. He knows everything about me and so do I. Including his marital issues (which are unfortunately plenty).
I know my family would not accept me marrying him although my mom adores him. My father would probably have a heart attack. They worked hard for us to be very well balanced, mentally strong women so I’m so surprised that I landed up in this position. I have an incredible family and lack nothing. Financially, emotionally, mentally… Everyt
